I always wonder what initiated our universe, or if multiple universes exist, the first universe. If you think of it chronologically, things can’t appear suddenly without precedent, and hence nothing logical can explain the origin of origin. Theories are therefore pure speculation and there is little mention of a pre-big bang period. In trying to cook something up, I’ve conjectured that before the appearance of the infinitely massive particle that started everything, time did not exist; hence, everything was connected, allowing the accumulation of the decayed mass of another universe existing on its own timeline. However, my argument is still plagued by the chicken/egg dilemma, for it just assumes the (first) universe existed. In fact, there are endless iterations of this problem when you try to go from nothingness to existence; even if you presuppose the existence of a self-emanating god you must account for the creation of its will, and the creation of the creation of its will, and so on.

The failure of logic in explaining what is seems to point to the presence of an illogical, primordial force underlying the universe. If existence cannot be explained by reason then it does no good to consign it to the realm of philosophical or theological discussion, which operates according to deduction. Any conceptualization, no matter how thoughtful, has an equally merited and meritless place in explaining the mystery. Meritless, because it boils down to a mere fencing match of trying to defend your own version of things. It demonstrates the relative meaninglessness of words and concepts and the undue weight people assign them. More meaning can be derived from the visceral experience of life and the positive mental states of peace, contentment, etc., which merit most if not all of the purpose of words and concepts.